Our Universe is an AU - part 1

"Oh."

"Oh."

David, John, the Doctor, and the Master all stood facing each other.

"What the… what is going on here?" That was John, most nervous of the four, having gladly avoided most of the madness associated with the show, it just so happened he'd seen David in the store he was shopping at and they'd been leaving when all of a sudden… this.

David looked between the two men opposite them, "I've seen some freakishly good look-alikes  of me, but not you John… I dunno," Dave scratched the back of his head, not as bothered as he should be, probably.

"Master! Did you set up some doppelganger paradox behind my back?" the Doctor muttered hurriedly under his breath while David talked.

The Master wrinkled his nose, annoyed at the question, "Why on Gallifrey would I want to make doppelgangers of US? More importantly, why would I go to the bother of making them HUMAN? One idiot that looks like you is more than enough."

"Allo!" David interrupted the exchange with his usual candor and cheery smile, "excellent cosplays, really, go to con like that people would think you're us," he bounced on his feet slightly, "so I expect you'll be wanting autographs then?"

Everyone stared at him, the Master with a quizzical look like he was some oddly fascinating insect that was attempting to juggle, the Doctor just blinked and couldn't get over how STRIKING the resemblance was, if it wasn't for the Scotch brogue they'd be IDENTICAL, and John just looked at him like he was the world's biggest geek, which he was, and John was mildly ashamed to be standing next to him. A full grown man saying 'cosplay' and 'con' in the correct context was just not right.

"Um…" the Doctor broke the silence that had descended, "I think you're a little confused… you see we're… we're not fans…"

David grinned knowingly and nodded, "Of course you're not, you're more than fans aren't you," he winked, "Right then Doctor, Master…" he reached a hand out for the papers they wanted him to sign, he knew some fans were too proud or anxious to actually ask.

"Dave," John pulled on his sleeve, staring at the now puzzled look on the copy of David and the… ugh, vicious leer on his copy. The look was just… oh, god, did he REALLY make that face? It was so… bleh, he couldn't describe how much he was disgusted with himself at that moment.

David muttered out of the corner of his mouth, "Just play along, they're obviously huge fans and would be shamed if we pointed that out to them."

John shivered and cringed as his copy licked his lips, eyeing David up and down, "I don't think they're fans Dave… something REALLY weird is going on here…"

But David wasn't listening. "No, I… we're REALLY not fans, we don't even know who you two are…" the Doctor tried desperately to dissuade David.

The Master nudged his ribs, "Oh I don't know, your copy seems to know who I am… I like that…" he purred hungrily, the human Doctor, while an idiot was delicious to look at, and he'd shagged humans before, it wasn't SO terrible…

The Doctor cringed in disgust then glared daggers at him, "Don't you dare…" he hissed.

"Um… hate to interrupt again, but if you two aren't fans then, who are you?" David quirked an eyebrow between them, starting to think something might be amiss.

"That's exactly what we've been wondering about you two," the Doctor sighed, "I… well, we're…"

"John Smith and Harold Saxon, pleased to meet you!" the Master burst in, grinning cheekily.

David and John both took a half step back, paling; they looked at each other for a moment, then back at the pair.

"Is this some kind of joke?" John finally spoke up, "tell us who you are, really, because it isn't funny."

The Master blinked, consternated, "What on earth makes you think I'm not Harold Saxon?" the Master hissed aggressively, stepping closer to his copy, slightly unnerved that he was staring into his own eyes, but there was nothing behind them, no darkness, no anger, nothing to be scared of, just confusion. John however, swallowed hard, more and more on edge as this confrontation wore on.

"Because that was the false identity of the Master, who I played and who you are now dressed as," John managed, holding his ground, "and it REALLY isn't funny doing this to us, so just tell us who you are and… take off the stupid masks or make up or whatever it is that's making you look like us," it was a fleeting hope they were masks, but somehow, John knew they weren't.

"Master…" the Doctor intoned in a low voice, pulling him back slightly.  The Master raised a quizzical brow and muttered to him, "Okay, even I'm lost… did you dump us into an alternate universe again?"

The Doctor grimaced and rubbed the back of his neck, "I told you rifts were unpredictable… we appear to have landed in an alternate Cardiff, but I haven't got a clue which ONE… maybe if-"

David stared and it began to come together, it could be JUST possible… "Wait… you're him? You're really… him?" David gawked, stepping closer.

"Really who?" The Doctor leaned back, unnerved by his copy's proximity.

"You're… are you REALLY the Doctor?"