Shop Mobile More Submit  Join Login
"SERIOUSLY? AFTER ALL THIS TIME, YOU PICK NOW TO PROPOSE TO ME?" the Doctor shrieked, gobsmacked. Standing back to back with the Master facing more than a thousand daleks, cybermen, silurians, axos, all their old foes combined, bent on destroying the last two Time Lords in existence.

"Well given you laughed in my face and turned me down flat the LAST time I asked I thought I'd wait for an opportune moment," the Master shouted back, cutting down a cyberman that dared too close with his laser screwdriver.

"And THIS is an 'opportune moment' is it?" the Doctor was armed with a cutlass, which he was surprisingly handy with, even though he was rusty in his old age, and his trusty sonic for when he had time to stun his opponents.

"We're about to die together on a battlefield facing thousands of assassins sent to kill us, there IS no better time than this," the Master shot a wry grin at him before springing into action and taking down a dozen cybermen and a half dozen daleks in the process, "so how 'bout it Doctor? Will you marry me?" The Master's grin had turned manic, balancing on a deceased dalek head, firing his laser left and right at silurians as they tried to pull him down.

"Master! You- you…" the Doctor cried at him, struggling with a rather feisty axos, eventually being taken out by one of the blasts of the Master's laser, "Oh alright, fine! Yes, I will marry you, since this is the last time I will ever have to hear your botched marriage proposals ever again!"

"Oy!" the Master screeched indignantly, then quickly whipped up a cyberman arm to fend off a pack of silurians, "Overlooking that… dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to marry the last Time Lords in existence. Doctor, do you take me to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold, in madness and in health, and to be shagged for days on end when I'm bored and have nothing else to do?"

"WHAT?!" the Doctor actually blushed on the field of battle before shouting back. "That's not how it goes!"

"THAT'S HOW IT GOES IN THE BOOK OF SAXON!" the Master bellowed in return, grinning madly as he took out another fifty opponents, "Well, Doctor?"

"I… oh, alright, fine, I do!" the Doctor grappled with a cyberman, eventually wresting its head off, "And do you Master take me to be your lawfully wedded… husband," he blushed hard, knowing the Master was grinning from ear to ear over the fact that he stumbled, "to have and to hold, in madness and in health, and to NEVER try to take over the universe so long as you live!"

"Oh come on! I just wanted to shag you; you can't do this to me!"

"Ha!" the Doctor stunned a dozen more foes, "well we won't live long enough for you to have to obey it anyway, so what choice have you got?"

The Master glared death at him and gnashed his teeth, not appreciating that slam AT ALL, but growled out, "I do, you sodding, overly-benevolent, ball-busting wanker!"

The Doctor grinned cheekily, "I'll take that as a compliment!" And he then quite benevolently smack downed about 30 silurians.

"Now by the power vested in me, by me, I now pronounce us…" the Master ran over to the Doctor, using a dalek laser and cyberman arm to clear his path, "husband and wife!" He grinned viciously, then pulled the Doctor by his tie and snogged him deeply. The Doctor flailed for a moment then melted under the Master's tongue, mewling like a hungry kitten.

Behind his back, the Master flicked open a dial on the laser screwdriver and punched a button, causing a chain reaction bomb that simultaneously destroyed the remaining enemies. The Doctor didn't need to know that he had ordered all of them to attack just so he could finally get the Doctor's consent…
A bit of silliness. Man I haven't written crack in awhile 8C Raise your hand if you've missed it XP
Add a Comment:
 
:icon1996billiejean:
1996BillieJean Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2014  Hobbyist Filmographer
THAT'S HOW IT GOES IN THE BOOK OF SAXON!
Reply
:iconqualityrandom:
Qualityrandom Featured By Owner Feb 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
*sighs*

Master...

*faceplams*
Reply
:icondavid-tennant-fan:
David-Tennant-Fan Featured By Owner Feb 10, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
hee hee, first bit just reminded me of Pirates of the Caribbean. :D 'Wait for an opportune moment.' LOL, awesome.
Reply
:iconkisu-kaitori:
Kisu-Kaitori Featured By Owner Dec 22, 2013  Student General Artist
Overlooking that… dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to marry the last Time Lords in existence. Doctor, do you take me to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold, in madness and in health, and to be shagged for days on end when I'm bored and have nothing else to do?And do you Master take me to be your lawfully wedded… husband," he blushed hard, knowing the Master was grinning from ear to ear over the fact that he stumbled, "to have and to hold, in madness and in health, and to NEVER try to take over the universe so long as you live!
Reply
:iconbeyondlovesl:
BeyondlovesL Featured By Owner Dec 5, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
*raises hand* oh, and David said he's no amused... He thinks that this is odd...
Reply
:icondavid-fan:
David-Fan Featured By Owner Aug 22, 2013
Crack fiction is one of the best inventions ever....
Reply
:iconjediartist1315:
JediArtist1315 Featured By Owner Apr 11, 2013  Hobbyist Artisan Crafter
"Doctor, do you take me to be your lawfully wedded husband to have and to hold, in madness and in health, and to be shagged for days on end when I'm bored and have nothing else to do?" ..... One of the best sentences in fanfiction history. That was beautiful.
Reply
:iconixhearxthexdrumsxdad:
IxHearxThexDrumsxDad Featured By Owner Apr 2, 2013
"THAT'S HOW IT GOES IN THE BOOK OF SAXON!" XD that's going in the vows at my wedding! That was a really great read! I LOVE it!
Reply
:iconskye-rhyder:
Skye-Rhyder Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
:rofl:
Reply
:iconscotland-tardis:
Scotland-TARDIS Featured By Owner Nov 15, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
*sigh* time to maul the favorite button again.... XD!!! Love this fic. We all know if the master does care about home that way, he would so do this just for the hell if it.
Reply
:iconkatiakat999:
katiakat999 Featured By Owner Aug 10, 2012  Student Traditional Artist
"THAT'S HOW IT GOES IN THE BOOK OF SAXON!"
OMG! XD I laughed so hard! this crack fic was awesome! :D Well done, sir!
Reply
:iconregates:
regates Featured By Owner May 11, 2012
I thought it was a lot like Pirates of the Caribbean! :D I think the opportune moment gave it away! :D but still, very good! :)
Reply
:iconfailingwithstyle:
failingwithstyle Featured By Owner Oct 19, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
Only the Master would try to extort the Doctor into accepting a marriage proposal in such a way. Even though this is crack, it's still not that far off from what I'd actually imagine him doing.
Reply
:iconspam6467:
Spam6467 Featured By Owner Oct 8, 2011  Hobbyist Writer
So using the Master's vow in my wedding if I ever marry another Who-nerd. Thankies!
Reply
:iconkmeaghan:
KMeaghan Featured By Owner Jun 11, 2011
Lol, too awesome. Love this: "THAT'S HOW IT GOES IN THE BOOK OF SAXON!" I'm going to find a way to use that line in real life. No one will no what I'm talking about, but I will be amused. :)
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 17, 2011  Student Writer
DEFINITELY please do X3

I'm convinced everything awesome is in the Book of Saxon... along with how to resurrect the dead and stuff XP
Reply
:icongallifreyanangel:
GallifreyanAngel Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2011
*raises hand, giggling madly* Oh my goodness, this just made my day. :XD: Thank you for writing this.
Reply
:iconnienkeyork:
NienkeYork Featured By Owner Jun 4, 2011
Brilliant. XD
Reply
:iconvictoria-lebeau:
Victoria-Lebeau Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011
yes the marrige of the master and doctor nice
Reply
:iconvocaloidvampwars:
VocaloidVampWars Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011
*raises hand* i has!
Reply
:iconjemiyah:
Jemiyah Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011  Hobbyist Photographer
*raises hand*

CRACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK! 8DDD
Reply
:iconvulecrise:
Vulecrise Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011
So much win here xD
The Master sure knows how to propose XP
Reply
:iconcouldhavebeenking:
couldhavebeenking Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011
BAWHAWhAWHAW.
balls were busted <3
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011  Student Writer
*nods* OH YES XP BTW, on tumblr to, tell your friends XP
Reply
:iconsparklingblue:
sparklingblue Featured By Owner Jun 3, 2011
Oh this is brilliant! I love the Master in this!
Reply
:icondruidgirl1245:
Druidgirl1245 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
I love it XD
Reply
:iconallons-yeveryone:
Allons-yEveryone Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011  Student Writer
Dear lord where have you been! I've been waiting for your stories for sooo long!
Loved this sooo much! X3
Reply
:iconmarstersstalker77:
MarstersStalker77 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
Haha I definitely missed it! Love this. =D
Reply
:iconlilylily7000:
Lilylily7000 Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
*raises hand and flails it around madly*
Oh how I have missed your fics...XD
Best. Proposal. EVER
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011  Student Writer
XDDDDDDDDDDDDD thank you dear, I missed reading your comments X3

It's actually rather POTC3 inspired, Inja had this bloody idea of the Doctor and the Master proposing on a battlefield, I did my best to recreate that scene without looking TOO much like that scene XP
Reply
:iconlilylily7000:
Lilylily7000 Featured By Owner Jun 5, 2011
XD
I SO called it! When I was reading this I was like "hmm POTC-ish?" but in a very good way. Btw, while I'm commenting You should continue "Our Universe is an AU"!
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2011  Student Writer
Mmmmhmmmm... *nods* I'm glad c:

Arrrrrrrgh... yes, that << *sigh* I don't even know what I'm going to do with that :/ *sigh* Would you like to help chickadee? XP
Reply
:iconlilylily7000:
Lilylily7000 Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2011
Sure, how can I help?
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2011  Student Writer
Mmmmmmmm.. help me write what happens next of course XP If you're so interested you wouldn't mind a little RP? XP
Reply
:iconlilylily7000:
Lilylily7000 Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2011
But-but-but I can't write! I don't want to ruin it!!!! D8
And I can't do RP today, but are you free tomorrow? I have the whole day. (though I am going to fail at it D:)
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 6, 2011  Student Writer
Oh, pish tosh *rolls eyes* If you have an INKLING of characterization you can RP c: We'll start with something simple, not the fic, as doing REAL PEOPLE is considerably more difficult. And I'll let you pick, Doctor or Master, I don't mind c:
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconinjamorgan:
InjaMorgan Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
*raises hand and can't stop giggling and grinning like mad*

OH YES. I should give you more of my silly plot bunnies XDDDD

*kisses* THANKS :D
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011  Student Writer
X33333333333333 I'm glad you liked it c:

8snuggles* You're welcome, but PLEASE don't o_____O my brain is tired XP
Reply
:iconinjamorgan:
InjaMorgan Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
*snuggles back* Is it even possible that I don't like something you write? You're a genius, after all *nodnods* O_O

AND YOU CAN'T STOP THE PLOT BUNNIES! Muhahahaha!!!!
Reply
:iconthy-demon:
Thy-Demon Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011  Student Writer
Ummmmmmmm...? I''m pretty sure there's an AU somewhere where I can't write XP I'm sure you dont' like me then XP

*whimper* 8C Nooooooes...
Reply
:iconinjamorgan:
InjaMorgan Featured By Owner Jun 2, 2011
Okay, I have to clarify: Anything Doctor/Master related. There, you're a true genius. Really :3

*puts chibi!Master and chibi!Doctor in front of us* KILL TEH EVIL PLOT BUNNIES!!!
Reply
Add a Comment:
 
×

:iconthy-demon: More from Thy-Demon





Details

Submitted on
June 2, 2011
File Size
3.9 KB
Link
Thumb

Stats

Views
1,913
Favourites
83 (who?)
Comments
52
×